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You can send your ex a real scorpion on Valentine’s Day

You can send your ex a real scorpion on Valentine’s Day
Posted at 10:40 AM, Feb 07, 2023
and last updated 2023-02-07 11:44:44-05

Feeling stung by an ex this Valentine’s Day? Hard seltzer brand Topo Chico is offering up the perfect way to get them back: send them a real scorpion.

While real, the scorpion is not alive — but it is edible. Safe to eat, it’s dipped in a strawberry guava coating inspired by the brand’s signature seltzer flavor. The Scorpion Valentines go on sale for $6.99 on Feb. 10 at 8 a.m. EST through Feb. 14, or while supplies last. (Yes, that means the scorpion will likely arrive after Valentine’s Day, but that just makes it even more of a surprise!)

Simply fill out the form on Topo Chico’s website and your delivery will be on its way. The scorpion comes in a heart-shaped box and with a coupon for 50% off a 12-pack of Topo Chico Hard Seltzer. The 12-packs include four flavors: Tangy Lemon Lime, Exotic Pineapple, Tropical Mango and, of course,  Strawberry Guava, which is the same flavor profile as the scorpion.

Topo Chico

Looking for another way to show some “love” to your ex (or someone else who’s wronged you)? Now through Feb. 14, the San Antonio Zoo is offering up the chance to name a cockroach after your ex — which they will then feed to one of their animals.

The cost is $10, with proceeds from the annual Cry Me a Cockroach Fundraiser supporting the zoo’s “vision of securing a future for wildlife in Texas and around the world.” Last year, the fundraiser received 7,000 donations from all 50 states and 30 different countries. That’s a lot of scorned lovers!

San Antonio Zoo

If you’ll actually be spending Valentine’s Day as intended, however, you’ll find plenty of treats both in stores and in restaurants to celebrate with your friends, significant other or even by yourself.

From candy like Hershey’s chocolate-dipped strawberry Kisses, to heart-shaped doughnuts at Dunkin’ and Krispy Kreme and a heart-shaped ice cream cake at Dairy Queen, there are plenty of ways to enjoy the day!

What are your Valentine’s Day plans?

This story originally appeared on Simplemost. Check out Simplemost for additional stories.